‘In modern-day society, we see marriage counsellors helping couples with their marriages. People are constantly searching for how a healthy marriage works? Or How should a husband treat his wife? But do you know that the idea of maintaining a healthy marriage is not new to Islam?
Our beloved Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) already left his footprints and gave us an eminent example of how men should treat women; we have to abide by the sunnah. The Prophet Muhammad(ﷺ) was an ideal husband. He spent time with his wives, kissed them, played with them, and much more. Let us see how good of a husband he was.
Allah (SWT) sent our beloved Prophet(ﷺ) as a mercy to humanity so that we could learn how to live a good life by following in his footsteps. We belong to his blessed ‘ummat’ and are commanded to follow his actions in every aspect of life. He’s a great example of how a spouse, a father, a neighbor, or a friend should be. We could learn so much wisdom and lessons from his marriage or life in general.
“Allah has bestowed a great Favor upon the believers as He sent among them a Messenger…” [Quran, 3:164]
On the day of judgement, Allah (SWT) will account for how we treated others, specifically our spouses. Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) explicitly told humankind to ‘treat women well and be kind to them’ in his last sermon. What other reason do we need to treat women kindly?
Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said,”…The best of you are those who are the best to their wives”. [Sunan al-Tirmidhī 1162]
The Prophet(ﷺ) treated his Wives with Utmost Respect, Goodness and Kindness.
When the Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) had important matters to handle, he would sometimes turn to his family for their opinion. He used to ask his wives for advice and respected their thoughts and opinions. He never abused or raised his voice to any of his wives.
In one of the narrations of Aisha [R.A.] told us how Prophet Muhammad(ﷺ)was attuned to her feelings and would instantly know when she was sad or happy.
The Prophet (ﷺ) Enjoyed Meals with his Wife.
Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) used to eat and drink with his wives, and at times he also fed his wives with his own hands. The Prophet (ﷺ) would take a bite from where Aisha (R.A.) had taken a bite.
Our beloved Prophet taught us how to put the flavour of love in the food and cleared some of the misconceptions regarding females.
Menstruating women are impure; this prejudice is broken by the Prophet (ﷺ). While Aisha’s (R.A.) was menstruating, the Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) used to recite the Quran leaning on her lap.
It is a common misconception that only women are obliged to do the daily household chores. While cooking and cleaning are basic life skills which everyone should know irrespective of their gender. It is a sunnah not only to help your spouse but to serve them.
Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) taught us that household chores are not gendered but are basic life skills. He used to help and assist his wives in their household work.
The Prophet(ﷺ) used to Beautify himself for his Wives.
Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) used to dress up and apply perfumes when he used to go home to his family. His family was a priority for him, and he used to put in efforts to look good for them. He used to do ‘miswak’ before entering his house.
The Prophet (ﷺ) taught us that both husband and wife have similar rights over each other, and not only wives but husbands should beautify themselves for their wives.
The Prophetused to Spend Quality Time with his Wives.
He used to say kind words and joke with his family; sometimes, he would play with his wives and race with them. He used to be intimate with his spouses and fulfilled every right of his spouses.
Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) said: Having intercourse (with one’s wife) is a charity.” [Muslim 1674]
The Prophet (ﷺ) taught us the importance of intimacy between couples and the right of a wife to receive intimacy from her husband to fulfil her needs. To this day, women are looked down upon for their need to get intimate. According to some cultures, women are not supposed to have sexual needs.
“They are your garments, and you are their garments”. [Surah Baqarah, verse 187]
The above Ayah mentions ‘equality in a marriage’. Husband and wife are similar to what clothes are to a human body. Just like clothes protect our bodies from outside environments and are close to us, spouses should protect each other and always speak good for each other. Just like clothes increase our beauty, spouses should enhance each other’s inner beauty (character). Just like clothes are comfortable, spouses should provide comfort to each other.